"Liberals declare end of intolerance as Arnab resigns!"
In an unprecedented news that dropped like an atom bomb on Tuesday evening, Arnab Goswami put his resignation at Times Now headquarters in Mumbai. The nation went in a state of collective frenzy as Arnab fans, mostly the right wing expressed shock and disappointment with the resignation while the left let out an Arnabesque euphoric roar.
Rajdeep Sardesai and Hafeez Saeed who were at Barkha's house celebriting Bhai duj were ecstatic when the news of Arnab's resignation. Rajdeep gave Barkha a bear hugand then reported, "This is a historic moment for Indian media. This will change India like 2014- The elections which changed India!" And jubiliantly threw copies of his book at our reporter.
Barkha was equally happy with the news. She reported to us, "All credit goes to my brother, Hafeez Saeed. It's due to his death threats to Arnab that he has decided to resign. Proud of you my bro" saying so she kissed Hafeez Saeed on the cheek.
Hafeez Saeed's joy knew no bounds as he immediately telephoned all his militant friends in Kashmir and asked them to start the revolts afresh. Hafeez said, "Today nobody will shout at your face out loud. No news channel will show you in bad light, comrades. From today onwards, entire nation will watch my sister at the prime time slot!" He was interrupted by Rajdeep's sudden bout of coughing.
In other parts of the country, Nayantra Sehgal, who had started the Award Wapsi campaign spoke exclusively to us and reported, "The intolerance has finally ended with Arnab's resignation. I am taking back my award which I had returned!"
As if on cue, 50 other intellectuals also lined up and decided to hold press conference asking the government to return their awards.
Aamir Khan declared, "Finally now I can proudly say, Kiran and I feel safe at home in India. There is no Arnab Goswami barking at us in our drawing room.! The nation has all of a sudden become tolerant.!"
People across the border in Pakistan also celebrated this news by firing crackers instead of bullets at the border as LOC witnessed a rare ceasefire. Politicians across the length and breadth of the country also rejoiced as they would no longer be answerable to the nation.
Supreme court judges were however sad with this news as one of the judges reoorted, "It was so easy for us when he was on Newhour. He would gauge the mood of the nation and pronounce the judgements himself. So nobody paid attention to whatever decision we took. But now with Arnab gone, our decisions will be scrutinized minutelt. Please come back soon, Arnab." The judge who wanted to stay anonymous almost broke down in front of our reporter.
Ashutosh, the senior AAP leader was excited with this news. He remarked, "Wow. This is great news. Arnab is retiring from media. Wow. I am planning to restart my 2nd innings in media now. As such, Times Now will be needing anyone with good quantity Englis for there Prime time sow. I am ready for the job. I will question Modi on the show and I will see how the Modi answers now!"
~ Devashish Palkar
In an unprecedented news that dropped like an atom bomb on Tuesday evening, Arnab Goswami put his resignation at Times Now headquarters in Mumbai. The nation went in a state of collective frenzy as Arnab fans, mostly the right wing expressed shock and disappointment with the resignation while the left let out an Arnabesque euphoric roar.
Rajdeep Sardesai and Hafeez Saeed who were at Barkha's house celebriting Bhai duj were ecstatic when the news of Arnab's resignation. Rajdeep gave Barkha a bear hugand then reported, "This is a historic moment for Indian media. This will change India like 2014- The elections which changed India!" And jubiliantly threw copies of his book at our reporter.
Barkha was equally happy with the news. She reported to us, "All credit goes to my brother, Hafeez Saeed. It's due to his death threats to Arnab that he has decided to resign. Proud of you my bro" saying so she kissed Hafeez Saeed on the cheek.
Hafeez Saeed's joy knew no bounds as he immediately telephoned all his militant friends in Kashmir and asked them to start the revolts afresh. Hafeez said, "Today nobody will shout at your face out loud. No news channel will show you in bad light, comrades. From today onwards, entire nation will watch my sister at the prime time slot!" He was interrupted by Rajdeep's sudden bout of coughing.
In other parts of the country, Nayantra Sehgal, who had started the Award Wapsi campaign spoke exclusively to us and reported, "The intolerance has finally ended with Arnab's resignation. I am taking back my award which I had returned!"
As if on cue, 50 other intellectuals also lined up and decided to hold press conference asking the government to return their awards.
Aamir Khan declared, "Finally now I can proudly say, Kiran and I feel safe at home in India. There is no Arnab Goswami barking at us in our drawing room.! The nation has all of a sudden become tolerant.!"
People across the border in Pakistan also celebrated this news by firing crackers instead of bullets at the border as LOC witnessed a rare ceasefire. Politicians across the length and breadth of the country also rejoiced as they would no longer be answerable to the nation.
Supreme court judges were however sad with this news as one of the judges reoorted, "It was so easy for us when he was on Newhour. He would gauge the mood of the nation and pronounce the judgements himself. So nobody paid attention to whatever decision we took. But now with Arnab gone, our decisions will be scrutinized minutelt. Please come back soon, Arnab." The judge who wanted to stay anonymous almost broke down in front of our reporter.
Ashutosh, the senior AAP leader was excited with this news. He remarked, "Wow. This is great news. Arnab is retiring from media. Wow. I am planning to restart my 2nd innings in media now. As such, Times Now will be needing anyone with good quantity Englis for there Prime time sow. I am ready for the job. I will question Modi on the show and I will see how the Modi answers now!"
~ Devashish Palkar
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